Instant Messenger [02:12AM]
Tim: holy shit

sastian: what?

Tim: that .txt is awesome

sastian: thats just a quick export from itunes of my nin list

Tim: waiting on 1 song and i have them all, for with teeth….. got’em
listening to pretty hate machine now, hard to beat that.

sastian: march of the pigs here.

Tim: fucking awesome

sastian: hell my whole collection is meticulously collected with album art included

Tim: wow

sastian: “we’re in this together” is hard to beat

Tim Horstman: I didn’t know that. I knew you had a lot, but not like that.

sastian: I was kinda hard core about NIN for a while, but I had to back off for its spiritual impact. lemme paint a picture,

[02:28AM] sastian: I was one of those people who reordered albums and would get all ceremonious about listening to the whole thing all the way through, with the phone off the hook and all, right?
So anyway, I’m in Georgia, I getup early, go to the record store. get my copy of “The downward spiral” thats laid aside. I get back to the apt., close the shades, locked the doors, cut the phone cord, popped in the CD

..track 3 plays. Heresy

got me so pissed, i took it out without listening to the rest of the album, took it out to the driveway and lit the fucker on fire
you see, Trent to me was all about the pain and hurt (usually emotional)

Tim: you set the downward spiral on fire?

sastian: “Pretty Hate Machine” was one of those albums you listened to while screaming at “insert girls name here” bleary eyed in your car, but once you cursed my God, you crossed the line. curse the bitch, sure. But not my God

Because in the back of my mind I identified with the pain. You see the humanity in it and yet think, man I could help him with the truth if it ever came down to it.

Tim: don’t you think that all of the analogies to god and the devil and such is really referring to the “man” the record company, big corporate America and all of the assholes that fucked him before

sastian: no

Tim: not really about god

sastian: I still think it was an honest assault

Tim: I don’t think so

sastian: ah well, just boiled my blood. and Trent went back to just being a very talented artist.

It’s like soda, it tastes really good, but in some way, deep down, if your smart, you know it’s killing you. a little at a time.
Everything you take in, food, art, thought, music. it builds who you are or tears it down… but, I still enjoy an ice cold coke in the bottle, and I can still jam to Trent

Tim: hmmm, taken it too seriously. it’s more for Trent than us
it’s his therapy

sastian: heh, I can dig that

Tim: rather than drugs. follow me? perfect drug

sastian: but i just chose not to Live in the nut house

Tim: LOL